Comments on: Free Stuff

By: doco

doco — Thu, 05 Apr 2007 15:26:00 +0000

Several years ago my kids gave me a Monty Python Flying Circus cd containing a program when loaded turns your keystrokes into a plethora of farts and belches. Even when knowing it is on the machine it is absolutely hillarious to use. But when loading it on an unsuspecting secretary – it is side splitting….

By: Nile

Nile — Thu, 05 Apr 2007 10:06:00 +0000

Remember the PlaySound API? Use an add-in to play suitable sounds (asynchronously) for all workbook events. I recommend Barnyard.com as a suitable .wav library. See if you can find some whirring machinery noises (or a cuckoo clock) for Application.Calculate

Also, I used to work with a Goth girl - black clothes, black nail polish, black eye-shadow, huge black boots... I changed the Office menus to a third-party font called 'Hammer House of Horror', a splendidly Gothic font from low-budget horror movies set in Transylvanian castles. She was delighted with it!

By: byundt

byundt — Thu, 05 Apr 2007 06:16:00 +0000

Most people don't know how to use Styles. So I created one for Normal style that displays "April Fool" instead of zero. To do this:
1) Open the Format...Styles menu item
2) Select the Normal style from the Style name dropdown at top, if it isn't already selected
3) Click the Number format twice (the first click unchecks it, the second one rechecks it)
4) Click the Modify button
5) Choose Custom format type, then enter the following string in the Type field
#;-#;"April Fool";@
6) Click OK twice

If I were feeling really mean, I'd store it in Sheet.xlt like Roger suggested. That way the problem only pops up after you add a worksheet. Sporadic problems are always more vexing.

Brad

By: sam

sam — Thu, 05 Apr 2007 05:47:00 +0000

My fav april 1 trick is to set in Tools options Edit - Move selection after enter as Up
So when a user press enter key the selection goes up rather than down... The look on the users face makes my day...

Sam

By: Susan

Susan — Wed, 04 Apr 2007 19:16:00 +0000

i used this one on my secretary this week....... it was even more priceless since she's been on some medication lately & she said she spent about 10 minutes staring at it trying to figure out if it was her or the machine. once she realized it was not her, she knew who to accuse!

it is in a regular module.... once you run it you can delete it & then close down their excel & the menus stay messed up until you run the code again. in the sample workbook which i downloaded, the code is run by worksheet buttons to make it easier.

Sub ReverseMenuText()
On Error Resume Next
For Each m1 In Application.CommandBars(1).Controls
m1.Caption = Reverse(m1.Caption)
For Each m2 In m1.Controls
m2.Caption = Reverse(m2.Caption)
For Each m3 In m2.Controls
m3.Caption = Reverse(m3.Caption)
Next m3
Next m2
Next m1
End Sub

Sub ResetMenu()
Application.CommandBars(1).Reset
End Sub

Function Reverse(MenuText As String) As String
' Returns menu item, backwards with original hot key
Dim Temp As String, Temp2 As String
Dim ItemLen As Integer, i As Integer
Dim HotKey As String * 1
Dim Found As Boolean

ItemLen = Len(MenuText)
Temp = ""
For i = ItemLen To 1 Step -1
If Mid(MenuText, i, 1) = "&" Then _
HotKey = Mid(MenuText, i + 1, 1) _
Else Temp = Temp & Mid(MenuText, i, 1)
Next i

' Convert reversed string to Proper case
Temp = Application.Proper(Temp)

' Insert & for hot key
Found = False
Temp2 = ""
For i = 1 To ItemLen - 1
If UCase(Mid(Temp, i, 1)) = UCase(HotKey) And Not Found Then
Temp2 = Temp2 & "&"
Found = True
End If
Temp2 = Temp2 & Mid(Temp, i, 1)
Next i

' Transfer ellipses to end of string
If Left(Temp2, 3) = "..." Then Temp2 = Right(Temp2, ItemLen - 3) & "..."

Reverse = Temp2
End Function

:)
susan

By: Kruncher

Kruncher — Wed, 04 Apr 2007 17:23:00 +0000

Sorry, it’s not Excel related, but I like the one where you take a screenshot of the poor guy’s desktop, move all of the shortcut icons into a new folder then make your screenshot the desktop wallpaper. Gets them every time!

By: Simon Herbert

Simon Herbert — Wed, 04 Apr 2007 12:58:00 +0000

Not mine, I have had this in my archive so long that I had to google to find where it came from...

I have adapted it slightly to open the CD tray when Excel opens, but I think the original came from Ivan F Moala as this was the only result for my search term, but if you recognise it from somewhere else plase say so: http://www.xcelfiles.com/VBA_Quick8.html

Place this into a standard module:

Public Declare Function SendCDcmd Lib "winmm.dll" _
Alias "mciSendStringA" ( _
ByVal lpstrCommand As String, _
ByVal lpstrReturnString As String, _
ByVal uReturnLength As Long, _
ByVal hwndCallback As Long) As Long
Dim lRet As Long

And this into ThisWorbook

Private Sub Workbook_Open()
lRet = SendCDcmd("set CDAudio door open", vbNullString, 127, 0)
End Sub

All of a sudden Excel controls that handy coffee cup holder...

This also works with "set CDAudio door closed" so you could set a loop running to open and close repeatedly...

By: Anthony Francis

Anthony Francis — Wed, 04 Apr 2007 10:36:00 +0000

I tip my hat to Roger... Great work!

I entertain myself in the office with:

Sticking down the button on phones so when someone picks up the handset it just keeps ringing.

Moving keys around on keyboards so folks can't type if they don't know where the keys really are (I got in trouble for that one after IT replaced 4 keyboards in a day)

Putting tape over the sensor under mice so they don't work.

I'm the only person in the office with any VBA knowledge so all your tricks will entertain me

By: jrisch

jrisch — Wed, 04 Apr 2007 08:54:00 +0000

Not exactly an April Fool Joke, but I wrote an attendance register template for all our team leaders to use. It was driven by userforms, and one guy kept trying to report non-existent bugs and eventually annoyed me enough to the extent that I introduced a simple labelling bug in his register, but put it on a timer such that by the time he’d managed to drag me over to see this, the label had been corrected. Then it was set to work infrequently but randomly. All the other team leaders were in on this so he could never get anyone to admit they could see the problem too. Cruel or what!

By: John Walkenbach

John Walkenbach — Wed, 04 Apr 2007 03:15:00 +0000

A variation on Hui’s theme. Flip the screen shot vertically, so it’s upside down. See how long it takes for the user to stand on his/her head.